I m female, 21 years old, 4.8 height and 42 kg weight. I am suffering from psychic problem. I think I have bipolar disorder, I get too much angry, anxiety,stress, and get depressed soon. I will break every object when I get angry I will become out of mind in that time, I broke more then 25 mobiles and other things and I repented for all that after some time but I cannot control that behavior every time I do that and I repent after some time. I am fed up with that. I tried commiting suicide also many times once I was saved in difficult situation so I do not have guts to try that again and I do not like to but I cannot live like this.
I have less friends, I am creating problem to my parents also. I really tried to change my behavior but I am not able to do anything about it. I beat my mother in angry I am in that guilt currently. I do love my parents but my anger is the main problem. My current mood is I do not want to live and I do not like to die in between this. Please help me to come out of this problem.
Welcome to icliniq.com.
I am sorry to hear about your situation, I can understand it must be really difficult for you right now. What you are describing looks more like depression with anxiety, for bipolar disorder there has to be episodes of Mania which can be diagnosed after complete evaluation and psychiatry history.
First thing you need to understand is that your behaviour is partially in control of you when you have a mental health disorder and the actions that you do because of depression or bipolar, is not much under your control but with medications and proper therapy treatment you can control these. There are two things that you will need to get help with this, starting psychotherapy that is counselling sessions which will help you in controlling your anger and it will also help you vent out your emotions and all the guilt that you are holding which is making you even worse.
Secondly you may need medications which can be decided after complete evaluation. Please find a local therapist or a psychiatrist they will guide you. If you cannot find the local therapist we can start therapy online via video consultation. Please do not worry, it might take some time but it is definitely manageable.
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