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How to overcome sexual attraction towards my mother?

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How to overcome sexual attraction towards my mother?

The following is an actual conversation between an iCliniq user and a doctor that has been reviewed and published as a Premium Q&A.

Medically reviewed by

iCliniq medical review team

Published At April 1, 2017
Reviewed AtJanuary 12, 2024

Patient's Query

Hi doctor,

I am a 22 years old male. I feel sexually attracted to my own mother. I had some mild feelings since childhood, but it became strong since teenage. I started feeling to be loved by mom as her son and sexually too. I sometimes feel guilty about it. But, I could not control myself. I saw my mother naked sometimes and this fed my lust towards her even more. I am getting dirty thoughts about her when I think about having love with her. I also watch porn especially incest. I want to express my love to her sexually. Please provide some way to overcome this. I am not under any medication. I am just trying to control myself mentally.

Hello,

Welcome to icliniq.com.

I can understand your problem. Sexual feelings in an adult towards a female are considered as normal and acceptable. But, such feelings towards any female with blood relationship are not acceptable in any society and this result in significant blow to reputation and respect. The feelings you have described towards your own mother are wrong and should be controlled. In future this might result in relationship problem in your case especially towards your wife. This might result in difficulty in maintaining relationship with any other female. To overcome the problem you have to work hard. One thing is that stop watching porn completely. If that is not possible at this moment then watch videos only and avoid going to forums or reading stories of incest online. Such things increase the perversions. Avoid watching any material that relates to incest. I am not saying that you should stop masturbating but stop thinking about incest. You are having guilty after incest ideas, so most likely these are intrusive ideas and should be treated also. If possible visit a psychiatrist for help. Medicines like Paroxetine or Fluoxetine can help to control your intrusive ideas and you will feel better. These are safe medicines. Spend your time in outdoor activities. Gym and sports will help to vent out your energy and you will feel better. Avoid spending more time on computer and if your work permits then stop using computer or internet for some days. This will help you to overcome the addiction.

The Probable causes

The probable cause is psychological conflicts.

Patient's Query

Hi doctor,

Thanks a lot. You are completely right. You told me the same causes and treatment I thought them to be. I have another problem of overthinking. I live my life according to some morals and rules I have developed, which I know are very good. But, whenever something happens which annoys me I get completely obsessed with that problem and get very uncomfortable. I cannot think of any other thing till that problem gets solved. This problem of overthinking or obsession annoys me even over trivial issues. What should I do about it? I somehow try to keep myself under control, as I am a very religious and moral person. Sometimes I think so much over a problem and I get completely exhausted and headache starts. What should I do?

Hi,

Welcome back to icliniq.com.

The sexual symptoms are also related to these complaints of overthinking only. Overthinking is there due to intrusive thoughts which are bothering your mind. All these symptoms are related to obsessive compulsive symptoms and need proper evaluation. These thoughts are producing distress and you are aware of the fact that these are baseless. You know that there is no need to think excessively but still these are persisting. This means that you have obsessive compulsive thought process. The medicines I have mentioned like SSRIs (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors) especially Paroxetine or Fluoxetine can help to overcome these thoughts. These medicines will help to control intrusive thoughts and you will feel better. Please consider consulting a psychiatrist in person for physical evaluation and you will surely see improvement. Thank you.

Same symptoms don't mean you have the same problem. Consult a doctor now!

Dr. Seikhoo Bishnui
Dr. Seikhoo Bishnui

Psychiatry

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