I am not able to get over the fact that the girl I loved cheated on me. Please help.

Hello,

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Firstly, it may be common for all of us to listen to such issues that we are going through, but each one of us can realize the pain only when we personally face such a situation. The fact that the girl cheated on you does not make you responsible for her betrayal. You, as an individual, did all possible things to maintain a pure relationship. So, it is her loss in the end. Also, I usually suggest not to try and stop thoughts about her. People might say, 'stop thinking about her.' But, I will not suggest the same. Instead, let us follow a simple technique called 'Time Out.' Whenever you decide, during your day, spend a specific amount of time thinking about your memories with her. But it has to be timed. Let us say, for 20 minutes. Then, keep a timer, and when the alarm rings, stop there. Remember, it is hard to fight yourself, but surely it is not impossible. You will require at least a week to master this time-out technique. Keep yourself busy with your work or studies. Do not try hard to avoid common friends. Participate in social gatherings and hang out with peers. Pursue your hobbies or favorite sport actively. Accept that she is gone because the worst pain is given by hopes that she will come back after realizing her mistake. And who said that you could not cry? Crying or getting angry is a perfectly normal human emotion. Accept that you are human and embrace the fact. Crying is like therapy which is an automated process by our brain. Some additional questions: I would like to know if your sleep is disturbed. Do you have difficulty going to bed, awakening in between, or waking up early? When alone, are you being tearful or crying without reason? Is there emotional numbness? Do you get angry easily? Is your behavior affecting others at home or y our workplace? Also, have you been in any other relationships after that? Thank you.