My husband is mostly sad and depressed. He cannot listen a word against him or his family(mom, dad & sister). He gets mad and behaves very rudely with everyone if they do not agree to what he says. He fought with his boss in his company for silly reasons. He abuses me emotionally and mentally. He hides from colleagues and friends about his marital status, to some he says he is not married and to some, he says he is married, and his wife stays with his family and works in a bank (but I live with him and work in MNC).
He always uses to tell a lie to me in small things also, he is never ready to accept his fault. Even if it is evident that it is his fault, he will never agree. He was flirting with some girl and went to meet her, and I got to know this when I checked his phone when I confronted him, he got mad at me. He is not ready to accept that he is at fault. He never answers my questions, always diverts the discussion. He does not have any plan. He hates my family for no reason and always say abusive things against them. He says he loves me but never let me live happily. In short, he is still right. Is he mentally ill?
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I can understand your concern. Considering the history of the symptoms you have mentioned, there are few possibilities. One is some underlying mood disturbance which could part of bipolar disorder. This should be appropriately evaluated to make a diagnosis. Repetitive mood swings, keeping grudges, anger outbursts, repetitive lying, etc., are seen commonly.
Such symptoms can occur as part of some personality disturbance. Anger, irritation, etc., could be related to personality issues. Please talk to him and if possible, consult a psychiatrist. Mood stabilizers can be used to control his anger and mood swings.
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