How to deal with guilt due to sharing intimate picture without consent?
Hello doctor,
I am a 37-year-old, IT professional, married for eight years, and have a kid too. I am not sure if I did really be able to convey the feeling I am going through, or even if I should share this issue with anyone. But somehow managed to convince me to open out about the problem with a doctor. I have a caring wife and a lovely kid and I've been leading a happily married life till now. I do not keep any secrets from my wife except for the sexual fantasies that I have or the occasional adult content that I watch on the internet. And I was not feeling guilty over this since I thought it was natural and common for men and women to indulge in such things. During the Covid lockdown, out of boredom, I started chatting with some anonymous friends in a chat app. This developed into a habit and I used to chat with them frequently as it was a good means to kill time and to relieve my work stress. Gradually we started to discuss our sexual life and got into details about our intimacy in our marriage. All this felt quite normal to me since we were anonymous to each other and will never come to know who the other person is. The discussions used to get heated up sometimes and I ended up sharing a few intimate pics of my wife (not with her face or identity revealed). This happened in one or two instances and I immediately felt extremely guilty over this act. I then deleted all the chat history and never went back to using the app again. I do not know what I was thinking when I did that. Now this guilt is hurting me a lot and this thought comes up again and again. I feel I did a big mistake with my wife. I am sure the pics were permanently deleted and will never be misused by anyone. Still, inside my heart, I feel shameful for this act of mine. I also thought of revealing this to my wife but I have no clue how she will react. I fear that my marriage will be shattered if I open up about this to her. I am not a religious person too, so I can not even repent over this. I have kind of lost my peace of mind and I have sleepless nights thinking about this. How do I deal with my guilt? Is it human to make such mistakes and get over them? I would be grateful if you can give me your valuable suggestion to overcome this situation.
11 Jan 2024 - 1 min read
The mood swings I get a week before my periods affect my personal life. Please help.
Hello doctor,
I am 23 years old female. I am having mood swings, especially during my periods. The mood swings start one week before my periods and in case the periods get delayed, they last till the first day of my periods. These are highly affecting my personal life. I have PCOD too so I have irregular periods.
28 Dec 2023 - 1 min read
How to I overcome the depression because of a failed relationship?
Hello doctor,
I have been dating a girl I met on a dating app a couple of months ago. Our feelings grew with time, and we started liking each other until I confessed my feelings to her one day. Although she said she felt the same for me, she did not say the three magical words to me. I am going next month to meet her, and we have planned a six to seven-day trip together. We were going strong until a few days back, I saw her in a social media post with a guy where she is seen having late-night video calls with him, and she captioned those as "late night date nights." These posts were from the last five years. She had told me about that guy previously. Apparently, the girl used to take her younger brother to that boy's home to play when they were kids. Eventually, they became very close friends. She has known him for the last 15 years. The girl has always been honest with me. She had also planned a trip with that boy in the past where they stayed in the same hotel for five days. Not only that, she even confessed to sharing a bed with him for five nights as there was no couch. This totally freaked me out, and I started enquiring more. She said both were fully clothed while in bed and did not share any physical contact ever. The only physical contact between them is they hug each other whenever they meet. Her rationale for having shared a bed with him was that she was single back then, and he knew everything about her past relationships and was a great friend. Hearing all this made me angry, and I expressed my discomfort with her behavior and the fact that she is still friends with him. She said that it would not be possible to chuck him out of her life as they are family friends and even their parents know each other. In spite of all this information, I was not feeling any better. All this led to a quarrel when I said her relationship with that boy would affect my trust and our future prospects of being together. A couple of days ago, I asked her to reduce communications with him, to which she said that she had not spoken with him for months, and they do not frequently speak anymore. He texts her once in a blue moon, and that is when they have a quick call to catch up on their lives. I was still not able to come to terms with what had happened.
Two days ago, I again brought up the topic, and this time I asked her to tell that boy about me and make him talk to me, so I know his version. She said she was uncomfortable with all this as that boy was close friends with her brother, and she did not want people to know about us this way. She felt they would have a bad impression of me and find me very insecure. In the heat of the moment and after a few arguments, I told her I did not want to continue the relationship any further. She hung up the phone and expressed her anger over what I said. She wrote that she loved me. We got back together on the phone in the evening, and since then, she has been saying the three magical words very frequently. She never brought up the topic of that boy, and neither did I. She says she feels confident, is looking for a future with me, wants to marry me, and that she wants to confess to her mother about our relationship soon after we meet. Although things seem fine now, all this seems like an eyewash to me just to avoid any further discussion on that boy. For the past couple of days, we have been experiencing the best times where we are very cozy and comfortable, and she often keeps saying she loves me and can not wait to meet me. We are on the phone for hours every day. I like her and do not want to lose her, but at the same time, that boy's episode bothers me a lot and often makes me question her behavior, although I do not express it. Do you see any red flags here? Could she be taking me for a ride? Are all her emotions fake? Kindly advise what I should do now.
Thanks.
18 Sep 2023 - 1 min read
I have depression symptoms despite increasing the dose of antidepressants. Kindly help me.
Hi doctor,
I have had delusions and paranoia in the past due to marihuana use. I have had problems with depression and bipolar symptoms due to substance abuse. It has been two weeks that I increased Fluoxetine from 20 mg to 40 mg and Aripiprazole from 10 mg to 15mg. I switched tobacco smoke to IQOS during this period. I drink coffee often. I do not abuse other substances. I am unemployed due to COVID and make myself busy with painting. I often walk also. I do not have much will for other hobbies. I think I do not have a better mood increasing my medications, although I do not have anger anymore. How should I continue my therapy? Previously I use to take Risperidone and Zoloft. Kindly give your opinion.
21 Sep 2021 - 1 min read
My friend hears strange voices in his head. Do you recommend sleeping pills?
Hi doctor,
My boyfriend has been suffering from irrational thoughts for the past year or so. He has already consulted a doctor, but he says he hears voices like "the pills has been distributed." He told his friends he had a headache and asked for Paracetamol, but they have given him two pills which have caused him to behave in such a manner. He is telling me that he hears voices and people are talking to him. Kindly help me.
09 Jun 2021 - 1 min read
