Dr. Saraswat Kumarshri Shriniwas
Psychiatry
The following is an actual conversation between an iCliniq user and a doctor that has been reviewed and published as a Premium Q&A.
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Patient's Query
Hi doctor,
I am a 25 year old male. I am scared of turning into a gay or homosexual. In the past, I had senseless and intrusive images popping in my head that I am kissing a guy whenever I used to be with my male friends. I never felt an attraction towards any guy. It happened six years before, but never thought about the reason. This thing stopped when I asked about this issue to a doctor and he said it as OCD. Everything was fine for over six to seven months. But, when I over think about why I am getting those images in my mind then the thing gets worse. I check every time when I see a guy whether I am attracted to him or not. Indeed, it sounds like I have gone mad. In my office there is a guy who is very attractive. But, when I fantasize him just to check whether I am normal or turning into a gay, I feel weird. But, I cannot stop myself looking at him. I envy him too, because I always wanted personality, health and voice like him. Whenever I see him I feel something different as if I am looking a girl. I am scared now. Please help.
Hello,
Welcome to icliniq.com.
After analyzing your current complaint and taking into consideration your previous history, I am of the opinion that your current symptom is also asymptom of Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). An obsession is an automatic, repetitive, intrusive and senseless thought or image which pops into a person's mind. Your previous symptom of seeing images of kissing a guy was an obsession. A compulsion is an action that you cannot resist doing despite knowing that it is senseless and should not be done. Your current symptom is a compulsion. Obsessions and compulsions are both seen either together or individually in obsessive compulsive disorder. OCD frequently changes its form and tends to threaten you of your worst fear. Homosexuality is when you are sexually attracted to someone of the same sex. In it you wish to be in a sexual relationship with a guy. If your symptom is causing distress, it should be treated with cognitive behavior therapy or medicines like Fluvoxamine or Clomipramine. Thank you.
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Treatment plan
Patient's Query
Thank you doctor,
Today, I saw on television that two men were wrestling and they fall on each other in missionary position and when they fall I liked the way as their bodies touch. I love that position with women, but not with men as I never fantasize them. But, I like to fantasize those men in the same position. I do not feel like having sex with any men. I know this well, but still I do not understand why I am feeling like this now. I am very much frightened now. I do not want to be a gay. Can you elaborate the reason? Am I turning into gay?
Hi,
Welcome back to icliniq.com.
It is only when you are sexually attracted to someone of the same sex, that you are a gay. You have mentioned it now and before that you do not feel like having sex with a guy. That confirms that you are straight. Your repeated checking to confirm whether you are a gay by thinking guys in a particular position, is a form of compulsive checking. It is another symptom of your OCD. You might like the image that comes in your mind, but that has nothing to do with your sexual orientation. You are seeking out for reassurance that you are straight is also a symptom of OCD. So, OCD is presented in different ways, each time, threatening you of your worst fear of turning into a homosexual. After some time, this thought or symptom might disappear, but takes some other form along the same theme. You need treatment for OCD, if it is affecting your life and consuming your time and energy.
Probable diagnosis
Treatment plan
Patient's Query
Thank you so much doctor,
I actually liked the skin contact in that position with women only. But, I saw the exact position of men. Why did I like them in that position? Is it OCD again? Shall I ignore such things in future?
Hi,
Welcome back to icliniq.com.
It is just an image that you liked. You see so many images on the television. Some you like and some you do not. If you note down all the images that you liked, you will find a lot of meaningless images in them. The image fitting in your mind and you are attaching meaning to it as a part of your fear is a part of OCD. So, next time, if something sticks in your mind and you find yourself attaching some meaning to it in relation to your sexual orientation, be aware that. This could be OCD in a new form. Thank you.
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