Can open communication and encouraging the partner help improve sexual relationships?

Question

Hello doctor,

My husband has a shorter penis, measuring around 3.5 inches after erection. He is not skilled in oral sex either. When he fingers me, it feels more like a duty rather than something he enjoys. This situation does not make me feel positive; instead, it makes me feel uncomfortable, negative, and sometimes depressed. I also know that he has never had a girlfriend before, possibly due to the smaller girth and size of his penis. As a result, I do not experience the pleasure I desire. We usually stick to positions where I am on top, but I feel disappointed every night. I am unsure how to approach the topic of improving his oral skills, at least. Please suggest something.

Thank you.

Answer 1

Hello,

Welcome to icliniq.com.

First of all, I would like to inform you that having a smaller-sized penis may only have psychological disadvantages and not real physical disadvantages, as a penis as small as 3 inches can still stimulate all the sensitive areas of the female vagina. However, the size of the penis does not become an issue as long as the man enjoys intercourse with his partner, which unfortunately is not the case for you. Although I do not have any shortcuts to teach him good oral skills, you can at least motivate him to improve. Simply express that he is already great at oral sex, but you would like more and expect that he will make some improvements. It is important not to ridicule him and expect him to improve. At the same time, encourage him to engage in more foreplay than he currently does.

Thanks and regards.

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