HomeAnswersPsychiatrybehavior disorderMy 7-year-old son has disturbing sexual behavior. How to handle him?

Can you give some advise on how to pursue with my son's unusual behavior?

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The following is an actual conversation between an iCliniq user and a doctor that has been reviewed and published as a Premium Q&A.

Answered by

Dr. Ashok Kumar

Medically reviewed by

iCliniq medical review team

Published At December 23, 2016
Reviewed AtAugust 10, 2023

Patient's Query

Hi doctor,

My seven year old son has displayed a very disturbing sexual behavior. As far as I know, the incident was isolated. I am unsure if this is a usual behavior for his age group or not. I thought he was playing video games when I grounded him from them, because he was up in the playroom very quiet. So, I snuck up on him, expecting to catch him playing games. When I looked around the corner, I noticed my son petting our pet cat, with his pelvic area against the cat. I was not sure what I was seeing and I was confused at first. But within a couple of seconds, he started to pull his pants down. He clearly did not know I was right there. He was erect and I am unsure what he was planning on doing. I just shouted and interrupted whatever he was planning. He got scared, was clearly embarrassed and ran to his room immediately. When I tried to talk to him about it, he would not tell me what he was doing. Instead, he just cried and said he did not want to tell me. The only thing I managed to get him to tell me was that he had a funny feeling down there. I am worried that this is a sign of something more extreme, maybe he has been abused. This seems like extremely unusual behavior. He does not have any other signs or symptoms of abuse and this is the only time something like this has happened. I do not know what to do. I told him that he has to keep his body parts to himself. If he has a funny feeling again, then he should never touch anybody or anything with it. Can you give some advice on where to go to get him help? Should I even pursue further help? Or should I just keep an eye on him and continue to talk to him about keeping our body parts? I do not know what to do, as this is unusual. I am embarrassed to ask anybody about this. I feel as though this is something that should not be overlooked. This does not seem like a typical situation. Please help.

Answered by Dr. Ashok Kumar

Hi,

Welcome to icliniq.com.

I read your query and understand your concerns. If the incident is isolated, then I think you should overlook the certain incident other than trying to know where he got all this information. There is a good possibility that he has either seen some videos (may be porn) of bestiality or on the lighter side animal mating. It is also possible that he may get this information from some of his peers. Abuse is unlikely as you mentioned that he has no other symptoms of abuse. Regarding his behavior, I think you need to talk to him in alone when he is comfortable. It should be without fear of punishment or any such thing. Providing sexual education is one part of the situation management and I think you have done the right job. In addition, if you decide to keep an eye on him never do it beyond the limits. He may become more secretive and you will never know what is happening in his life. In my view, if he reveals nothing serious, then the issue should be dropped here itself. Experimentation is part and parcel of growing years and we all do it and your child is not an exception.

Same symptoms don't mean you have the same problem. Consult a doctor now!

Dr. Ashok Kumar
Dr. Ashok Kumar

Geriatrics

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