HomeAnswersPsychiatryexcessive inappropriate guiltI feel guilty of my previous actions. How can I overcome this feeling?

How can one overcome guilty feeling and live a happy life?

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The following is an actual conversation between an iCliniq user and a doctor that has been reviewed and published as a Premium Q&A.

Answered by

Dr. Aditya Gupta

Medically reviewed by

iCliniq medical review team

Published At September 20, 2023
Reviewed AtJanuary 11, 2024

Patient's Query

Hello doctor,

I am a 22-year-old married woman. My husband is truly the best in the world, always caring for me. However, I have been feeling guilty recently about some incidents from my past. During my childhood, when I was in class seven, a boy expressed interest in me. Although I did not reject his advances, I accepted his gifts. One day he insulted me, and I decided to end the association with him. I realize that it was not a real relationship. At that age, I did not fully understand love and its complexities. I genuinely believe that the only person who truly matters to me is my husband. Inspite of all this, I still feel guilty about the situation.

Additionally, while preparing for my SSC exam, I had a male friend I considered my best friend. He confessed his feelings for me and referred to me as his girlfriend. Although I did not have romantic feelings for him, I did not explicitly reject his advances. In truth, I used his friendship for study-related benefits. However, after some time, I started finding his presence burdensome. I feel guilty for not being honest with him and taking advantage of our friendship.

I am grateful that I found my husband six years ago and I love him with all my heart and soul. I have confided in him about these past incidents, and he reassured me that they do not affect our relationship. He is a fantastic person who always tries to make me feel comfortable. Despite his understanding, I still carry the burden of guilt and struggle to move on. Please help.

Answered by Dr. Aditya Gupta

Hi,

Welcome to icliniq.com.

I read your query and understand your concern.

The past cannot be undone and holds no significance, so there is no point in dwelling on it. There is no need to feel guilty as you have honestly disclosed everything to your husband, and the best part is that he has handled it maturely. To address persistent thoughts, I suggest you to follow these steps:

  1. Practice meditation for at least 30 minutes in the morning to relax and improve focus.

  2. Write down your thoughts without any filter and reflect on them.

  3. Incorporate regular exercise and maintain a balanced diet.

  4. If you find it challenging to cope on your own, consider engaging in psychotherapy.

  5. Medications are unnecessary now, and non-pharmacological methods should be utilized instead.

I hope this helps.

Please feel free to ask if you have any further questions.

Thank you.

Same symptoms don't mean you have the same problem. Consult a doctor now!

Dr. Aditya Gupta
Dr. Aditya Gupta

Psychiatry

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