I have had the following problems for quite a few years. I was all right at first, but lately, it has been getting worse. Moderate to severe depression almost all the time such that feeling happy is an escape and a treat. I harm myself when feelings go out of control. I hit or bang my head, and other parts of my body and I swear at myself. Lately, the frequency of such incident is increasing. Other people only know me as silent or very quiet, though occasionally I turn talkative. I am extremely scared of human relationships. I suffer from addiction to porn and binge eating. I feel extreme tiredness. I generally despise and have a morbid fear of romantic relationships and though I feel jealous of people who do. I try to avoid any such happenings in my life. I almost always try to be perfect in what I do and get depressed when I cannot. Sometimes, I talk to myself like I am two people, one cursing or talking soothingly and the other receiving it. I took an online personality test today, and it tells me I may have borderline personality disorder. Can you please tell me what am I suffering from?
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