HomeAnswersAndrologypoor erectionWhy do I have an erection problem during sex and not during masturbation?

I do not get erection problem during masturbation, but why during actual sex?

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The following is an actual conversation between an iCliniq user and a doctor that has been reviewed and published as a Premium Q&A.

Answered by

Dr. Ashok Kumar

Medically reviewed by

iCliniq medical review team

Published At April 7, 2015
Reviewed AtSeptember 23, 2022

Patient's Query

Hello doctor,

I am a 32 year old male. I started masturbating ten years back. CurrentlyI masturbate daily morning and night. Sometimes, I achieve erection very quick, and sometimes it takes time. I masturbate seeing porn videos. The problem is, when I entered marriage life, I could not get a proper erection to penetrate my partner. I could get partial erection, but that goes down soon. I also get less excitation when I actually touch or feel the body than seeing porn. Due to this, my marriage life was affected leading to divorce. I do not get erection problem during masturbation, but why during actual sex? How to cure this? I would be married again soon in a month. Kindly help.

Answered by Dr. Ashok Kumar

Hi,

Welcome to icliniq.com.

I read your query and understand your concerns.

It is your thought, which is creating the problem. For a man of 32 years with regular masturbation for the last 9 years, it is easy to understand that there is no problem with erection. It is the guilty feeling associated with masturbation that is creating the problem. In other words, it can be said that the problem is a psychological one. This is common in men who think masturbation is wrong. At this stage, I would like to advise you a few things:

  1. First, stop thinking that masturbation is a problem or it leads to an erection problem. I would like to inform you that masturbating is completely normal and there is no point in being ashamed about it.
  2. One can masturbate 2 to 3 times a week and not more than that. Because it might lead to addiction.
  3. Marriage is not about sex or procreation, it has many things which should be considered. Develop intimacy with your future partner before having sex.
  4. While engaging in sex, devote at least 20 to 30 minutes for foreplay. Without that, you will never know the true value of intimacy and giving sexual pleasure.
  5. Stop thinking that you have a problem. It is absolutely normal not to have an erection on one or two occasions. Failure does happen in life and sex is no exception. Accept it and move on.

Same symptoms don't mean you have the same problem. Consult a doctor now!

Dr. Ashok Kumar
Dr. Ashok Kumar

Geriatrics

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