Q. How can I divert my mind when I become sad due to the rude behavior of my loved one?

Answered by
Dr. Suresh Kumar G D
and medically reviewed by Dr.Nithila A
This is a premium question & answer published on Jun 16, 2019

Hello doctor,

I am a 32-year-old woman. The one with whom I am in love sometimes behave rudely to me. He remains silent whenever he dislikes anything that I say. I am a bit outspoken, and I am unable to control this. His silence kills me. I find it difficult to do routine work.

I feel so sad and shattered. He will not answer my messages and will not pick up my call even if I had called 50 times a day. I feel like hurting myself. I suffer from depression since childhood, and I am taking Amitriptyline since the last 13-14 years. How can I divert my mind and focus on my work during those times? It happens almost twice a month. We are together for five years now.



Welcome to

It looks like you and your partner have different personality styles and deal with conflicts differently. For example, if you are an extrovert, you would like to talk your way through issues. But if your partner is an introvert, he may have an aversion to conflict and arguments and may withdraw during stressful periods. This is a natural way of responding to some people and not to be taken personally.

If your partner is otherwise fine and treats you well, it may be helpful to have an open and honest discussion with him when both of you are calm. Write down your thoughts if direct talking can be difficult and ask your partner to reply. Both of you have to respect each other and learn to form your ways of dealing with conflict as a couple. It is natural for all couples to have disagreements, try not to overthink in such situations. Try relaxation techniques and carry on with your usual routines.

If needed, you can try counseling or couples therapy. Also, look after your emotional health. Consult your doctor to review your mental health and the need for continuing anti-depressants. I hope this helps.

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