What can be done to improve libido?

Hi,

Welcome to icliniq.com.

I read your query and understand your concerns. Before I can answer you, I request you to provide the following details. This is important because without proper information the suggested intervention is unlikely to help you completely.

1. Your age?

2. Duration of problem?

3. How it started?

4. Do you have early morning erections? If yes, how frequent and strong they are?

5. What effect it caused to your relationship?

6. Do you have any medical illness? If yes, details.

7. What treatment you received so far and its effects?

8. Partner details? Whether she is very critical or demanding?

9. Tests undergone till date and results?

Hi,

Welcome back to icliniq.com.

Although provided details are not enough to diagnose a condition (no laboratory tests are available and I do not have the opportunity to examine you personally) but the available details are more indicative of psychological erectile dysfunction with premature ejaculation as primary cause. In other words the performance anxiety is primary cause for early discharge and having lack of interest in sexual activity.

Although complete treatment is advisable only after doing physical examination and laboratory investigations, I feel doing the following sort of intervention can help you partially if not completely.

Now regarding the problem, I would like to inform you that psychological ED or performance anxiety can be handled with use of right psycho therapeutic approach. In my own experience around 70 % of individuals report dramatic improvement in erections once the psychotherapy is started leading to decrease in performance anxiety.

Below here I am delineating few of the strategies which will help you in the problem.

Firstly, get rid of thoughts that you may be sexually inadequate or your doubts that you may not be able to perform properly. This is because performance anxiety, feelings of sexual indequacy, self-doubts, guilt, past negative sexual experiences, poor communication or understanding with the partner, etc., can all affect sexual functioning and performance. Removing such ideas will eliminate the majority of causes for your poor sexual performance. Removing the person's doubts and fears, and improving his self-confidence levels will definitely help in improving sexual performance.

Remember that sex is not just a physical act but also a psychological process involving an expression of emotions, intimacy, and love. So, just involve yourself in those feelings and stop focusing on your "performance" alone. Once you do that, then I assure you that your sexual performance will automatically improve. Most importantly, performance anxiety soon becomes a "vicious cycle" That is, anxiety leads to poor performance and poor performance then leads to further anxiety and this keeps on increasing.

One more problem responsible for performance anxiety is inadequate sexual arousal. When the person is not properly aroused, the blood flow to the penis is not maximal, and so, after a few strokes, the erection weakens and ejaculation occurs. The way to tackle this is not to rush into intercourse quickly, but wait till you get fully aroused. So, increase and spice-up your foreplay. Make sure that you initiate penetration only after both of you are fully turned on. Good foreplay not only arouses you but also sparks off the mood in your partner. So, when she is also aroused and involved, then things keep flowing smoothly and effortlessly, and you do not have to be constantly anxious if you are satisfying your partner or not. Distract yourself, stop "monitoring" your sexual performance. Try putting on some romantic music or mild lighting while you make love. Think about the things that turn you on. Taking your mind off of your sexual performance can remove the worries that are stopping you from getting fully aroused.