Q. I cheated on my wife and am really worried about HIV. Please help.

Answered by
Dr. Meha Malhotra
and medically reviewed by iCliniq medical review team.
This is a premium question & answer published on Oct 19, 2017

Hello doctor,

I am a 35 year old male. I cheated on my wife and I am really scared that I may have HIV. When I say scared, I mean night terrors, huge anxiety, and no appetite (lost 15 pounds in three weeks). I cannot work and it is all I think about. The circumstances are as follows. I performed oral sex on a female. I then fingered her and then masturbated myself with the same hand. I have asked a few professionals and they say I am only at risk theoretically but have no real risk of contracting HIV. However, my body tells me differently. I have had a sore throat for 20 days, no appetite, pain where my liver and spleen are, weakness in my legs that come and go and a hint of nausea every now and then. I have night sweats that awaken me but they are accompanied by panic. My heart feels like it is going to burst. My tongue and mouth burn, but I think that is acid-related because my breath is awful, no matter how much I brush. I had an Alere combo HIV test at 25 days and that was negative. I have never had a fever, rash, swollen nodes, or any of the common symptoms. My questions are what is my real risk of contracting HIV? The health department said I do not need to retest and that 25 days was enough time for accurate results with that type of test. Is that true? Could this all be anxiety and guilt?



Welcome to

I understand that you are worried but it is not the end of the world.

  • You actually have a very low risk of HIV (human immunodeficiency virus) transmission from this exposure.
  • Though the test is sensitive, you should get a fourth generation ELISA (enzyme-linked immunosorbent assay) test for HIV at six weeks and repeat the test at three months. That is the standard protocol.
  • And yes, the guilt is causing all these anxiety-related symptoms. Get yourself tested and put an end to all this anxiety. Please eat well and try to sleep.

Hope this helps. Take care.

For more information consult an HIV AIDS specialist online -->


Hello doctor,

Thanks for the response. I am very worried about my spleen and liver being enlarged. Could ARS cause this? Are my symptoms common with ARS? Could a gallbladder hurt all the time causing the pain to radiate?



Welcome back to

  • Fatty liver is a common incidental finding during an ultrasound. It has grades too. Grade-1 being mild and can be reversed with lifestyle modifications like changes in diet, quitting alcohol, etc.
  • For the spleen, it is best to consult a gastro physician. Liver and spleen enlargement can be due to several reasons, infection being one.
  • Gallbladder inflammation or gallstones can cause abdominal pain.
  • But without further investigations, it is difficult to comment on the same.


Revert with more information to an HIV AIDS specialist online -->

Was this answer helpful?


Same symptoms doesn’t mean you have the same problem. Consult a doctor now!

Related Questions:
Can anxiety and stress cause frequent urination?

I use to get those episodes every few months when I had stress but since I got the fear it might never go away I get it almost daily now ... Can anxiety cause polyuria like this clear urine when I am stressed ...   Read full

I am experiencing a feeling that urges me to die. How to come out of it?

.. very sorry to hear about your current mental and marital problems. From the information that you have provided, you seem to be suffering from depressive symptoms for the past two months. It could be a part of an underlying depression or an adjustm...   Read full

Can the lower abdomen pain be due to ovulation?

The abdominal cramps, constipation, even mild spotting and increased mucoid vaginal discharge are part of a premenstrual syndrome and shall all subside once your withdrawal bleed is initiated ... Hello doctor, For the past tw...   Read full

Also Read Answers From:

ideaComprehensive Medical Second Opinion.Submit your Case

Also Read

H3N2v Influenza - Treatment and Prevention
Management and prevention of an Influenza A virus variant include various treatment options and measures. The below arti...  Read more»
Flu A - Symptoms, Causes, Diagnosis, Treatment and Prevention
The flu, or influenza, is a contagious viral infection that attacks the respiratory system. Flu A and B viruses are resp...  Read more»
H3N2v Influenza: Symptoms, Diagnosis, and Treatment
The H3N2v is a non-human influenza virus seen in pigs and can cause human infection. To know more, read the article belo...  Read more»

Ask your health query to a doctor online?

Ask a HIV AIDS Specialist Now

* guaranteed answer within 4 hours.

Disclaimer: No content published on this website is intended to be a substitute for professional medical diagnosis, advice or treatment by a trained physician. Seek advice from your physician or other qualified healthcare providers with questions you may have regarding your symptoms and medical condition for a complete medical diagnosis. Do not delay or disregard seeking professional medical advice because of something you have read on this website. Read our Editorial Process to know how we create content for health articles and queries.